thank you, friends


Yesterday, I lost my wallet, which also had my keys attached to it. We were with friends in the park and then downtown on a Photo Walk. About an hour or so later, near the end of the walk, I realized my pocket was empty. A frantic search ensued but no luck. I filed a police report, canceled my credit cards/requested new ones, my rewards cards, requested new Starbucks cards,  changed the locks at my house and tomorrow will get a new driver's license. 

Those of you who know me well are probably not terribly surprised that this happened. It was only a matter of time, right? 

I have continuously said, "It could be worse" about the situation. But more than that, I'm grateful. Not that I lost my wallet and keys, but grateful for my amazing and wonderful friends who jumped into action to help.

For the most part, the friends we were with yesterday were new ones, having only met in person the week before. And yet, one group walked our entire route looking for the wallet, while others gave me a ride to the house, helped me strategize ways to get in, used their AAA to get us in our car where we had a garage door opener and ran back and forth between M and I (one of us at the car, the other at the house). When I'd calmed down from frantically worrying about all of this, I was overwhelmed with gratitude. 

I am grateful that Time Warner in South Carolina had Internet hooked up at my landlord's place down there so he could read my email and get back to me quickly regarding changing the locks. 

I am grateful that Menard's was still open after we heard from the landlord.

I am grateful that Wes was home, wasn't busy and was willing to come help us switch out the last four locks which were giving us a lot of trouble for some reason. We'd spent about 30 minutes frustrated with one. M had hit the wall with it and I struggled trying to do it on my own; he had them all finished in no time, at all! So, so thankful for him.

I am grateful that the process of canceling cards and requesting new ones is fairly simple and straightforward. I am really happy that Starbucks will issue replacement cards; I'd been so excited about getting my gold card and was pretty sad that I'd lost it. It's the little things, too, you know?

I am grateful that M did not get mad or annoyed or blaming. She was in crisis mode, looking for the wallet, trying to think of when she remembered me having it. She exerted energy into solving the problems rather than blaming me, which I deeply appreciate. It reminded me of something I read in Harriet Lerner's Marriage Rules. She talks about the moment our partners displease us or upset us or act childish or grumpy. We typically react in a way that is "punishing." We act badly back to them or try to ignore them. Lerner says this is the exact moment they need us to be the most kind. And M was and has been.

So although yesterday did not turn out like I expected and there were a million things we didn't do because of all the things you have to do when you lose something like your keys/wallet, I slept well knowing that we had new locks and that I'd done all I could really do. 

It happens every day. We lose things, misplace something. We lose moments, minutes, hours of our life we can't get back. People drift in and out of our lives. People we love are sick. There are so many things bigger than me, than my recklessness, than my lost stuff. I am grateful for everyone who made me a priority yesterday, who tried and did help in so many ways. 

I appreciate it more than you know.