worse ways

Yes, I have once again been playing with design. I can't help it; it's like a drug. Actually, it's a coping strategy for me. When I get really stressed or upset I need to do something tedious. I don't knit or sew or crochet so instead I design websites or rather redesign and revise them. I can think of worse ways to cope. Why do we that? Why do we automatically go for the "it could be worse" cliché? I suppose, sometimes in order to handle our lives we have to remind ourselves of all the good things we do have. But does that necessarily mean comparing our life to others' suffering? It seems kind of an attempt to easily "fix" how we feel instead of thinking about the complexities of life, of our feelings.

And yes, while there are worse things I could be doing it doesn't change the fact that in many ways I'm also avoiding doing much needed revisions and planning for class and a million other things like writing m C&W abstract due next week. I am choosing what is easy, what brings me happiness in incredibly simple ways over a different type of fulfillment. I often take the quick and easy thrill, that instant gratification over what might be deeper satisfaction and harder work.

That said, I will try to avoid designing any blogs or websites until my job talk for Millikin is completed. And then I'll be busy with birthday plans and my parents' trip. So I'll resolve to lay off the design until after Valentine's Day. Deal?