mixed feelings

Do you think you can like and not like someone simultaneously? Or do you think it's like, I like you in this moment but not in that one? What causes a mix of feelings about others? And when we dislike someone strongly or find ourselves drawn to someone should we feel relieved that at least our feelings are clear?

I ask because these types of mixed reactions have been occurring lately. And I'm not sure how to make sense of them.

Typically, I make up my mind about people in the first 30 minutes or so of meeting them. I respond viscerally though not always accurately, which is where the ambiguity emerges. *Note: I realize this is incredibly judgmental and self-absorbed of me.* I rarely give people a chance to change my mind about them but sometimes things change. Maybe I change or circumstances change and I see that perhaps I never gave him/her a fair shot. I might have judged too quickly or allowed my feelings to be filtered through those around me. I would say I give myself another opportunity to get to know someone or some place. Yes, these strange incongruous feelings are connected to places, too. It is never the other person or place that needs a second chance; it's me.

So, what happens when the backstory becomes evident to the person? (Not sure the place really cares as it goes on without you, whether you visit or not). Even if your feelings are no longer mixed, does it matter when all he/she sees is a pile of goo?

Can the person about whom your feelings have been mixed, ever embrace the ambiguity? What is at stake for them in doing so or not doing so?

I have mixed feelings about all of my family members at some point or another. My mother, especially. Even days I want to slap her, I still love her. If she knew the extent to which she makes me crazy, would we have the same relationship? If she read the previous statements, honest as they may be, how would we go on. And this is when I think honesty is not the best policy. It's not always good that people know where they stand with you. Let's face it, I'm not good at hiding my feelings. It comes out somehow. So does the fact that feelings about a person are mixed negate the good feelings one does have? And when you have mixed feelings, should you proceed as if you don't?